You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
