Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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