David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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