white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
You're like the curious george of whores
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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