we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
