What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize
