I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize