is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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