It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
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In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
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Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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