in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
You had me at "let me see your balls"
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Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
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