I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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