Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
