You work out of a Hotel?
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
