Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Everclear isn't food dammit
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
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