The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
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