she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
What happened to fro yo and sex?
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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