Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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