Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
false alarm. still invincible.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
