she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
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Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
ttyl tear gas
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
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New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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