i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I am midnight drunk by noon
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
