I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
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