i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
