How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo