Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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