its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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