I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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