You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
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