Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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