escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
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So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
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You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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