his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
