That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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