TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
