i dont even know how to be here
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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