I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
pray to the hookup gods
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
