Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Randomize
