apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Say something about gay babies.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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