is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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