thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Randomize
