found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
