Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Randomize
