Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
