now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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