all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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