if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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