I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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