Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
