I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
