Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize