I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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