Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
