Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
