Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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